Grandpa, what now?

Yesterday night, I drove to Laguna Hills, which is about 40 minutes from my house. My intentions? To visit my dear Grandmother, who was placed in a 24 hour rehabilitation/"sick seniors" home. The past couple years her health has gone downhill completely, most of it being her fault. She refused to listen to doctors. Ignored requests from my Grandpa over the course of the last couple years to get help, to get better, to fight the sickness and the weakening of her legs. It WAS totally possible, if she tried. She didn't. My Grandma, stubborn and spoiled by my Grandpa for 60 years, wasn't having it. They've been happily married for something like 60 years, and I admire their love SO much. Yet one problem- my Grandma has never had to work. Ever. Not once. So naturally she enjoyed and was accustomed to being taken care of by him. My Grandpa even hired 24/7 live-in help, but it became too expensive. So, this is where last night comes in.

My aunt calls me up on Wednesday, which happened to be the day after my Grandma's birthday. Grandma's been put in a 24/7 care center for seniors, she tells me. Grandpa can't do it on his own, she tells me. My heart dropped. I knew this was the last thing Grandpa wanted to have to do. But it had to be done. No doubt about it.

So I go last night and was taken aback at the sight of my ill, weak Grandma. It took all I had to not show that I was upset. Upset that is has gotten this bad. And even more upset that she's putting my Grandpa through all of this due to the simple fact that she didn't even try to reverse the problems. Looking at my stressed, yet STRONG, wonderful Grandpa with his amazing soul, I felt proud of him for being so brave and taking a step in the right direction, finally admitting he couldn't do it on his own anymore. Regardless of how I felt standing there, I reminded myself I was there to enjoy the evening with my Grandparent and Aunt and Uncle, who had brought In 'n Out for everyone. Yum.

I remember hearing my Grandma say "I want to go home", "take me home" at least a hundred times to my poor Grandpa. And the sad thing? He's considering it. He's considering hiring 24/7 live-in help, AGAIN. It costs an arm and a leg and isn't covered by their insurance. Making sure she's happy is still his first priority, even if it means going broke in the process.

Moving closer to my Grandparents was the best thing I ever did. They mean so much to me, and without them, I wouldn't be where I am today. And that's 100% true. They've helped me more than I could have ever asked for, and I appreciate them and their love and support. I'm fortunate enough to have Grandparents like them, especially my Grandpa. He's paying my way through school. He helped me get a car. The list goes on and on. He's one big heart and an amazing soul. And I can't help but wonder what happens from here. Yes, it's life. People get old. Family passes away and life goes on. But I'm not ready for any of that. Especially my beloved Grandparents...